Men? I Just Don’t Get Y’all

I was watching one of the entertainment shows last night and they were talking about, who else but Donald Trump. They were showing clips of wise cracks that he had made about Marco Rubio and vice versa. So, it caught my attention. It was actually Marco Rubio’s remark that caught my attention. He said “And you know what they say about men with small hands?” When I first heard this I thought “What in the hell?” Then he proceeded to say “That they can’t be trusted.” The crowds reaction to the first part of that statement was like mine. You could tell that we all knew what “they say” about men with small hands, and what he said, was not it. Well, that in and of itself wasn’t what was so funny to me. What I thought was funny was the guy in the audience standing behind Rubio. He was actually checking out his own hands. Like he’d never looked at his hands before. Like he just discovered he had hands. We all know why he was so intent on looking at his hands. He wanted to see if they were small or not. I had to rewind just to see the look on this guy’s face. He was looking at his hands and actually looking around at the other people near him. He said something to the guy next to him. The guy was probably his friend, I hope. But I was thinking that, I wondered what he said? What would you say? Did he say “Well, I don’t have to worry about that.” Or “That’s not true. Is it?” I don’t know what he said but I thought it was hilarious. I mean do people say anything about women like that? I mean we don’t make assumptions about women’s body parts being bigger if they have big hands or big feet or a big nose. We may suspect if a woman has all those things that maybe she’s not a woman, but we don’t judge the size of anything else by it. By the way, if a woman has all those characteristics then maybe you should check for an Adam’s apple. I’m just saying.

This just got me to thinking. No one obsesses about the the size of men’s packages more than the men themselves. Nobody else really cares. I don’t get it though. I mean you’ve got so much going for you as a man. I mean at least you have one. Who cares how big it is? But you. I mean come on? You can pee standing up. You can pee in a cup or bottle riding down the road. Camping is no big deal to you and you’re a man for gods sake. That fact in and of itself gets you places that us women either don’t get to go or just get overlooked for because we are the “weaker” sex(i.e. The President of the United States of America). You get to play pro football, albeit if you’re good enough but I haven’t seen any women in the NFL. You don’t have to worry about getting pregnant or having babies or good forbid having a period. You can walk around without a shirt on in public and you won’t get arrested. You don’t have to wear a freaking bra! You can hop up out of the bed and be ready and presentable in five minutes. You don’t have to wear makeup and aren’t expected to. You don’t have to shave any part of your body but your face and even if you don’t shave then that’s okay too. You’d just have a mustache, beard, soul patch or goatee. As a woman you can’t do that with any hair we have on our body. I mean can you imagine a woman walking around in shorts with all the hair grown out on her legs and saying to her friends “I just wanted to see what I’d look like with hair on my legs.” No, you aren’t going to see that. Why? Because we as women can’t get away with that but you guys can shave or not. Whichever decision you make is ok. You don’t have to worry about walking alone at night. You don’t get whistled at and lewd commits made because you’re wearing shorts or a bathing suit. You get a better deal on cars simply because you’re a man. The mechanic is not going to try and pull some bull crap on you to get you to pay for something you really don’t need because they’re afraid to, because you’re a man. You’re less likely to get sexually harassed. Not saying that doesn’t happen to men, at all. Just saying it’s less likely. You can wear your hair however you want to. You could shave your hair completely off and it’s fine. I mean you have so much going for you simply because you have that piece of equipment. Who cares if it’s big or small? I mean, I would trade places with you and not give a flying flip what size it was. Really.

In conclusion of this rant. Nobody really cares but y’all. So stop worrying over how big your hands, feet, nose, and that is. Start worrying about how you treat others. Especially women. Regardless of sexual orientation all of us women really want the same things. Someone who will treat us with respect. Someone to look at us as equal, not lesser. Someone who will love us for who we really are. Someone who loves us regardless of our age, weight, size, color, hairstyle, dress, how big or little our boobs or butt is, wealthy or not. We want to be judged by our minds not how pretty we are. That’s what we really want. To treat us like we are the only person in the world and the only one you want to be with. If you do all those things. Then we won’t care about the size of your thing. Got it? Good. Now, stop looking at your hands and start loving with your heart.